Jan 15. 2015. Visitor

It has been 8 months since I came to Africa. When I came here, I had a full of great ambition that I would do everything I could. I look back upon the past how I was in Sierra Leone, Tanzania, Zambia, Malawi, and here in Mozambique. I feel sense of accomplishment, and it was a rewarding work experience, but at the same time, I also have a feeling of doubt about my enthusiasm that I had in the beginning. 

I have experienced many extreme feelings; extreme fear for Ebola, extreme hunger at night, extreme diarrhea and constipation, extreme headache and stomachache from typhoid, extreme lonesomeness in the inky darkness, extreme despair in poor surroundings, and extreme thrill of bungee jumping. I want to ask myself what has been changed in Africa since I came. Ebola is still there in West Africa, mosquitoes are still buzzing around me, drinking water from out of nowhere is still doubtful, and blackout is a commonplace event at anytime…

Where can I see the dramatic improvement? Have I had an enormous positive impact on African society? Or am I a troublesome fellow who demands this and that all the time to people? That would not be possible that I can see something different within such a short period of time. 8-month is not probably enough time for me to feel the real nature of Africa. It was also beyond my capacity to expect the difference when it comes to the rapid health growth in Africa between last June and now.

“You may come back to Mozambique later,” said Korean friend during dinner. Well… I don’t know. To Mozambique, to Zambia, to Malawi, to Tanzania, to Sierra Leone, or to somewhere else, I feel inevitable destiny that would come back to Africa. Some Korean people who I met in Africa seem to have a high opinion of me, because I have gone through many hardships in multiple African countries. The other way, I think highly of them. They immigrate to here, volunteer for several years, promote public health project from a zero basis, and devote themselves to the propagation of Christianity. I merely have a superficial knowledge of Africa. What can I know about Mozambique during two weeks?

I was a visitor in Africa. At some point, I have reached the limit and realized that I would not be the exact same as local people. The thing that have made me uncomfortable spiritually all the time was I was the person who has grown inured to advantageousness and serviceableness from the well-to-do country, so to speak. I could not change my skin color; that may make local people target me at night on the street. If I cannot avoid being a vulnerable target in somber darkness, how should I find my freedom of going outside after dark? Has somebody eagerly wanted me to come to Africa to help them? No, nobody asked me to do that. I am here on my own free will, and honestly, I do not know exactly what should I do for people here. It is just nonsense to say that I always treat African people with a heart full of feeling, with worrying possible life-threatening accident, like armed robbery at night outside.

I was a stranger in Africa. I felt eyes from random inhabitants whenever I was walking or jogging around the street. I am always seen as an alien from China who carries lots of money. I have never heard “안녕하세요 (An-nyeong-ha-se-yo?)” on the street, but instead, I have always heard “Ni-hao!” They never knew I would feel unpleasant when I heard that. When I was not in a good mood, I did not even look at them and ignore it, but I have normally tried to receive their “Ni-hao!” greeting, because I believe it must be their token of intimacy. Yes, in South Korea, Korean people never say hello to others who they do not know on the street. If I do that in South Korea, people may think ‘쟤 모야? Is he crazy?’ 

So then, why do I have to insist on doing something for Africa? Actually, there would be many things to do for my home country. South Korea looks well-developed economically, but the level of satisfaction for life is poor. It is a rough place that suicide rate is the third highest in the world; 40 people kill themselves across the country every single day. Which country do you prefer to live? In South Korea where people enjoy the benefits of civilization but most of them feel unhappiness? Or in the poorest and least-developed country where you can feel easy but everything makes you frustrated?

Korean people who I have met in Mozambique must have been put up with all sorts of hardship to settle down. They invite trouble on purpose, putting aside from advanced civilization, to practice true love in this new strange land. Language, food, and climate are all different, infrastructure discourages them, danger of all kinds of disease lurks in the path of their lives and furthermore, some local staff who they hired are never cooperative. Notwithstanding, young Korean married couple willingly came to Mozambique for missionary work, newlyweds are counting down to the big day to meet and settle down in Mozambique, branch manager from Good Neighbors takes initiative to start health service for children and mothers’ health in Mozambique, a pastor from Korea Food for Hunger International have lived in Mozambique for 18 years for progressing project as well as preaching a sermon at church.

I was neither one nor the other. I am at the crossroads now; remaining as a visitor, or becoming genuine resident wherever I go. More to the point, I will not stop approaching people first who are suffering from disease, hunger and poverty to make the world a better place. I have just taken the first step into the real society, so I have a long way to go. Also, I truly hope all Koreans in Mozambique will assimilate into Mozambican culture well to realize their dream.